Peking Yuck: The 9 Worst Statues In China

Kobe Bronzed Somewhere Else

bronze Kobe Bryant statue Guangzhou China (image via: Yahoo Sports)

Perennial scoring machine for the Los Angeles Lakers and 15-time NBA all-star Kobe Bryant deserves a statue to stand alongside those of Magic Johnson, Jerry West, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar and Chick Hearn outside the Staples Center and now he does… well, sort of. The bronzed “Black Mamba” has indeed been rendered in metallic, larger than life fashion but his likeness is rooted outside the Guangzhou Academy of Fine Arts’ Sculpture Museum in Guangzhou, China.

Kobe Bryant Lakers China Guangzhou bronze statue (images via: Los Angeles Times and IBT)

Like it or not (and opinions vary widely), the bronze Bryant isn’t likely to be moved from his pedestal anytime soon. That’s a pity, as the unsigned and unattributed sculpture is probably the work of a student at the Guangzhou Academy of Fine Arts who didn’t know how to properly render the famous Kobe Death Stare in cast molten metal.

Think Pink

The Expression of Sex statue Shiyan(image via: Yaowen)

As the most populated nation on Earth, China has done much to discourage its citizens from having too many (meaning more than one) children. Perhaps one of the most innovative initiatives (though not officially intended as such) is a statue in the smallish city of Shiyan named “The Expression of Sex” or as we’d like to call it, the Big Turn Off.

Absent Apsara

Flying Apsara statue Urumqui China(images via: chinaSMACK and Northnews.cn)

59 feet, 40 tons, 11 days… we’re referring to the late and unlamented Flying Apsara statue in Urumqi, Xinjiang’s height, weight, and lifespan after completion. Dedicated on Friday, August 6th of 2012, the statue of the goddess Apsara in flight decked out in heavy makeup and a long skirt covered with living grass and colorful flowers loomed over a busy Urumqi intersection for a very limited time only. Following an 11-day firestorm of intense Internet criticism, the much-mocked Flying Apsara was suddenly and unceremoniously chopped into four parts and hauled away to parts unknown on flatbed trucks.

Flying Apsara statue Urumqi China(image via: chinaSMACK)

According to Ablimit Mijit, a resident of mainly-Islamic Urumqi, the semi-clothed appearance of the goddess “was difficult for some Muslim ethnic groups to accept,” and its public prominence would likely exacerbate tensions between the city’s ethnic Han Chinese governing authorities and the restive native population. As well, a majority of netizens complained that “the sculpture was ugly and did not represent a traditional image of female beauty.” Then there’s Jiang Yuanqi, a 24-year-old from Zhejiang province who stated that “Nobody wants to spend their tax money on such a statue, so lacking in quality.” Here’s a newsflash, Yuanqui, nobody wants to spend their tax money on removing such statues either.