Non Saints: 10 More Bizarrely Named Churches

Steve — Sun, 10 Nov 2019 18:00:15 +0000

[ By Steve in Design & Products & Packaging. ]

Any one of these bizarrely named churches could be in your hometown though they appear to hale from an altered state… pray we do not “altar” them further.

Prayer House Rock

Elvis may have left the building but he left a half-eaten peanut butter, banana and bacon sandwich on the collection plate. Welcome to the 24-hour Church of Elvis, a Portlandia attraction that isn’t really a church and has no known affiliation with The King’s estate. On the other hand, the eclectic storefront at 408 NW Couch is the self-stated “Worlds first 24-hour coin-operated Art Gallery” so at least it’s a profitable enterprise… like most churches. (images via brx0 and Steve Schroeder)

Let the Spirit Move You

Here’s the Palm Bible Church in Soweto, South Africa, whose sign out front bears the perplexing slogan “The Move of God”. Somehow we doubt that refers to Sunday being a popular moving day but hey, we’ve been wrong before. Let’s move on. (image via Paul Birnie)

Sin In Stranger

“Sin will find you out”? Hoo boy, that ship sailed a LONG time ago! Perhaps a better – or at least, more enticing – slogan might read “Salvation lies within”. We get it, though: neon signs don’t come cheap and like The Godfather says, fear can be a potent motivator. (image via Sam Lavy)

Pews ‘R Us

When they say “Find It Here”, they don’t mean sin… OK, depends on what type of used furniture you’re buying and what purpose it’s to be used for. Wait, you may be asking, what does used furniture have to do with a church? We can only shrug our shoulders and refer you to “Bill”… if you can find him. (image via Julia TortoiseHugger)

Fertile Pastors

The New Dimensions Worship Center might be “A Place of New Beginnings” but if their sign’s any indication, it’s also the scene of many happy endings. Gotta give ’em credit, though: while other churches advise that laying in bed on Sunday morning shouting “OH GOD!” doesn’t constitute going to church, New Dimensions replies “Why not both?” (image via David Smith)

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Non Saints 10 More Bizarrely Named Churches

[ By Steve in Design & Products & Packaging. ]

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Impreached: 10 Bizarrely Named Churches & Chapels

Steve — Sun, 07 Apr 2019 17:00:51 +0000

[ By Steve in Design & Graphics & Branding. ]

Bizarrely-named churches tend to stand out but someone must’ve got into the sacramental wine before tagging titles on these 10 hilarious houses of worship.

Foursquare Deal

Go ahead and snicker, Millennials, but the International Church of the Foursquare Gospel (aka The Foursquare Church) was founded in 1923 by Aimee Semple McPherson. Using “Blazing Saddles Logic”, the church can sue the Foursquare City Guide app which dates back to only 2008. Oh, and hopefully they’ll use a font other than Comic Sans when filing their legal briefs. Seriously guys, Comic Sans?? Flickr members Manne and Nick Richards snapped the Peckham, London, UK location of the evangelical Pentecostal Christian denomination in 2010 and 2015, respectively.

Wilsonburned

Have you seen this God? Because he is freakin’ AWESOME! He also looks alarmingly – five-alarmingly, even – like “Wilson” from the movie Cast Away. Now we know what happened to Tom Hanks’ voiceless volleyball pal after drifting away from that flimsy raft: he washed up in Buffalo, NY and became revered by the dumbfounded natives for his supernatural snow-melting power. Flickr member Jamie (jbcurio) snapped the Praise Tabernacle church’s admittedly awesome signboard in March of 2008.

Immaculate Perfection

A Perfect Church for an imperfect world… and a thumb in the eye to all those other churches that obviously must be flawed in one way or another. Flickr member genebrooks snapped the red brick “religious center” located on McDaniel St SW in Atlanta, GA on March 7 of 2016.

Be Fruitful

Give genebrooks credit, he’s got a knack for spotting weird churches – or in this case their van, parked somewhere in South Korea. We can’t imagine what a typical service at the “Church of Fruits” must be like but we assume their communion wafers offer parishioners sweet salvation with added Vitamin JC.

Fake Pews

We’ve got a reality show president so why not a church where the only thing scripted is… the scripture. Welcome to the 1st Keep It Real Fellowship Church, located in Little Rock, AR. We imagine Sunday sermons exhort penitents to keep the faith first, and ask questions like “If God is all-powerful, can He make a rock so heavy He Himself can’t lift it?” later. Flickr member LRD615 snapped the very real, as in “you can’t make this stuff up” real, church in March of 2007.

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