Life’s stressful enough without our stress relief balls freaking us out yet the more we squeeze these creepy stress aids, the more anxious we get.

Caomaru means “round face” in Japanese, and these pliable polyurethane resin stress relief balls come in four different molded expressions. If you’ve ever wanted to go full Kids In The Hall’s “Head Crusher” (or “Face Pincher” if you prefer) with an actual crushable/pinchable head/face, Caomaru is the stress relief ball for you!

Caomaru comes in a variety of pastel hues including black and beige (for you equal-opportunity haters), and they clean up easily with a little soap and water. You’ll never scrub the stains off your soul, however.

The Terrible Horriball

They say conquering anxiety is all about facing one’s fears… said whomever thought up the Horriball. “When your victim gives this seemingly innocent stress ball a squeeze,” according to The Greenhead, “clear bubbles filled with flies, rats, worms, or cockroaches covered in a bloody-looking liquid pop out of the holes!” Yeah, we’ll just keep our anxiety and leave now, mmkay?

Weakened At Bernie’s

Aww, isn’t that cute, DC Universe character Harley Quinn has a cuddly taxidermied and possibly zombified beaver named Bernie who speaks only to her… don’t you want one too? You might change your mind after getting up close & personal with the sticky icky Bernie “action figure”, part of the Designer Series from DC Collectibles.

This Bernie figure doesn’t talk but he does have one distinct talent, if you can call it that: when squeezed, a bloated bubble of guts bulges out from his mangled midriff. Relax your now-trembling fingers and the freaky fistula retreats back inside Bernie’s belly. Rinse, repeat, see a psychologist.

Next Page - Click Below to Read More:
Squeeze Play 9 Weird Bizarre Stress Relief Balls

Abandoned bowling alleys lie scattered across the landscape as if the gods of recreational sports had laid ’em low with a single thunderous strike.

Shoeless Hoes? You’ll find neither shoes nor hoes (a type of gardening tool, for the uninformed) at the long-abandoned and unfortunately named Hoe Bowl in Hyde Park, New York. Flickr user Edward Blake (edwardhblake) snapped the stricken state of the once-stylish bowling alley in November of 2014.

HoeBowl Family Recreation Centers, founded in 1958 and led by current CEO Diane Hoe, is a chain of bowling alleys centered in New York’s Hudson Valley. The Hyde Park location closed just after the turn of the millennium. In September of 2013, the property was sold to James Rogers, who received approval to build a 76-resident assisted living center at the site. Recent images, however, show no sign of impending demolition. One might say… the Hoe must go on!

Gutter Check

Flickr user Corrine Klug checked out the abandoned bowling alley hidden deep within the deserted Scranton Lace Company’s factory in January of 2012. A decade earlier, the company’s vice president infamously told employees, in the middle of a working shift, that the facility was closing “effective immediately.” One presumes the stunned workers dropped everything – bowling balls included (ouch!) – and trudged out the doors, never to return.

Vicious Circle

Remember those funky circular-ball-returns? This one’s funkier than most and the cheese-tastic carpeting only adds to the scene’s essential mustiness. Flickr user b lowe (vittelsandjuice) brings us this abandoned bowling alley still life dating from late 2011.

Next Page - Click Below to Read More:
Pinned Down 10 More Abandoned Bowling Alleys

Shed no racket tears for these abandoned tennis courts as there’s no bawls in tennis… OK, that’s out of line but these courts ARE out of service.

Looking like a set from The Walking Dead, this precariously covered tennis club in Europe’s Benelux region appears to have been abandoned twice – once by tennis players, then by the artist who owns (or owned) the place.

The former club must have been more than just a private backyard court – at least one line judge’s chair can be seen, shunted off to the side. Odd that the artist adaptively reusing the club as a studio would save such a specialized piece of furniture. Kudos to Flickr user Tunebm, who somehow was able to access the abandoned court in early July of 2010.

Wimble-don’t

Flickr user John Haslam (foxypar4) titles the above November 2008-dated photo “Malta in audacious bid to stage ATP Masters Series Final!,” and you can bet that’s an event anyone would gladly pay to see. Set into the long-dry moat surrounding the ancient fortified city of Mdina, the court has at least one thing going for it: chances of a successful Ottoman invasion are very unlikely.

The Open is Closed

Blue-blooded businessman and banker William du Pont, Jr (1896-1965) was quite the sportsman in his day. In the depths of the Great Depression, he had a grandiose recreation center housing basketball and badminton courts, a bowling alley, a swimming pool and a large clay tennis court built at his Bellevue Hall, Delaware estate.

By the early 1970’s, none of du Pont’s heirs had any interest in the estate’s deteriorating sports facilities nor the expense required for their upkeep. The property was purchased by the state of Delaware in 1976, opened to the public under the name of Bellevue State Park… and continued its inexorable decay. By 2014 when the above images were taken by Kyle Grantham for The News Journal , the sky-lit tennis court was overgrown with vegetation, infested with wildlife, and had been slated for demolition.

Get A Grip

This gorgeous abandoned tennis court in Herzliya, Israel would appear to have everything but regular maintenance and the odd player or two. According to Flickr user Elinor Zach (who snapped the seaside scene on January 2nd of 2008), “This tennis court used to belong to a hotel that was super posh in the 80s. I wish I could see the characters that used to bounce their little green balls there.” That’s what SHE said.

Net Loss

Flickr user Franck VIALA (Artretros) got down & funky – or should we say, fuzzy – back in September of 2011 when he snapped this shot of an abandoned French tennis court. “An abandoned tennis court where I used to play since I was 10 maybe,” states the photographer, possibly with the pictured tennis ball.

Next Page - Click Below to Read More:
Uncanny Volley 15 Abandoned Tennis Courts Clubs

Save the planet… for when you’re really stressed out! These 15 Earth Stress Reliever Balls put the whole world in your hands, allowing you both to bounce back from adversity. This surprisingly common stress ball design boasts a wide range of design variations so when you think you’re about to blow a gasket, don’t think local, think global!

Personalized Earth Stress Reliever Ball

(images via: QLP, Hexun, My Next Promo and WhatDoYouNeed.com)

Are you one of those A-type control freaks who’s just gotta put their stamp on the world, then squeeze it for all it’s worth? If the answer is yes, yes and yes, then yes we’ve got the perfect gift for you: a personalized Earth Stress Reliever Ball stamped with your name or company in a rainbow of different colors and a range of catchy fonts. The latter includes the much-despised and disparaged Comic Sans, guaranteed to totally stress out the competition.

Bio Degradable Eco Earth Stress Ball

(images via: GiftsTalk and Identity Links)

This unusually colored Eco Earth Stress Ball is biodegradable, just like our planet, and if there’s one Earth Stress Ball you’re squeezing on Earth Day it oughta be this one. According to the website sales copy, the ball is “made of recycle PU and natural non toxic bio degradable castor oil.” That first ingredient makes us a bit nervous, being that the ball is designed to be squeezed with one’s bare hands, but it seems “PU” is just an unfortunately chosen acronym for polyurethane. Whew! By the way, the copy also states the balls are packed individually… “in a PP bag.”

Earth Stress Cube

(images via: QLP and The ODM Group)

If the Flat Earth Society is looking for a great promotional item, may we suggest the world’s first Earth Stress Cube? Seriously, those FES’rs must be severely stressed out at the best of times, can you imagine what happens when they book a cruise? More realistically, the Four Seasons Hotel in Las Vegas is using Earth Stress Cubes in an innovative, eco-friendly way: guests who don’t want housekeeping to change their bedsheets simply leave the cube on their bed when they leave. No word on if the cube is comped and guests can keep it after they’ve blown their budget at the craps table.

Oversized Earth Stress Ball

(images via: Amazon.com, Edison School PTA, Oakland Seen and Blog of Life Here)

These outsized Earth Stress Balls may not be stress reliever balls in the definitive sense but think about it: what fun is there to be had with a 400-pound ball? When the focus is on stress relief, however, occasions like the Oakland Zoo Earth Day event succeed admirably in reducing stress on multiple levels.

Cat-astrophic Earth Stress Ball

(images via: QLP Blog)

We humans are pretty tough on our old and only stomping grounds but things could be worse: the planet could be dominated by cats! Take Jack here as a representative example. According to Jack’s owner, “He loved that ball until it fell apart 3 years later.” Makes our 200-year history of industrialization seem inefficient, inadequate and ineffectual to say the least.

Made-In-China Earth Stress Ball

OK, we’ll admit that most if not all of the 15 different Earth Stress Reliever Balls discussed in this post are made in China but this one makes no effort to beat around the bush: they’re sold online by Made-in-China.com. You’d think that an obviously Chinese Earth Stress Ball would depict the continents in a China-centric manner but no… actually, it’s hard to discern ANY recognizably Earthly land mass. Maybe the ball comes from the future!

Celebrity Earth Stress Ball

(images via: QLP Blog)

If you think your office is a stressful place, imagine working at The Office under the watchful eye of corporate escape goat and wannabe secret agent Michael Scott. Is it any wonder HR rep Holly Flax made up a fake name (“Fanny Smellmore”, heh!) to a cell phone service rep in order to scarf a free Earth Stress Ball? Admit it, you would too. Fans of The Office, Holly and stress balls will find the scene in “The Search”, episode #15 of season 7, which aired on February 3rd of 2011.

Earth Heart Stress Ball

(images via: Sourcing Planet, Logo’Me and SZ-Wholesale)

We all love Mother Earth, right? Then show your love for Gaia by squeezing, crushing, pummeling, twisting and pounding a heart-shaped Stress Ball version of our only home in the universe! Our planet’s withstood much worse in its 4.5 billion (6,000 if you’re an ID adherent) year history so it can certainly withstand your impotent rage next time you throw a temper tantrum.

Earth Man Stress Ball

(images via: Wah Mee and Garrett Specialties)

Earth Girls may be easy but an Earth Man can relieve your stress… not that there’s anything wrong with that. In fact, some overly stressed stress ball squeezers might find a little extra satisfaction in stretching our flexible friend’s arms and legs. No harm done, just look at the expression on the Earth Man Stress Ball above: it’s positively Pacific.

Multicolor Earth Stress Relief Balls

(images via: Promo Wholesale, Imprint Items and SZ-Wholesale)

“Color Your World” may be Sherwin-Williams’ motto but it could apply equally to the above selection of colorful Stress Relief Balls. A little extra color on the continents means a little more visual interest for the stressed-out slob (or slobette) who’s overdue for a strenuous squeezing session.

World Map Stress Relief Ball

(images via: My Planet Wholesale)

Colorful continents on your Earth Stress Relief Ball just not doin’ it for ya? My Planet Wholesale‘s got something for that: the ponderously named World Map Foam Earth Globe Stress Relief Bouncy Ball Atlas Geography Toy… whew!

Glow Earth Stress Ball

(images via: Office Playground, Motivators and Gift Ideas)
What’s the point of having an Earth Stress Relief Ball if you can’t see it in a darkened room? With the Glow Earth Stress Ball that problem will never come up. Now if you’re in the habit of squeezing Stress Relief Balls in darkened rooms, you may have another problem that demands treatment beyond what a Stress Relief Ball can bring.

Wrist Rest Stress Ball Memo Holder

(images via: Alibaba)

Talk about unfortunate names… the so-called “Earth Hand Rest Cum Memo Holder” from Malaysia’s Ideahouse is an ambitious example of multitasking in a product that does so many things – and does them well, if not all at the same time. Actually, it’ll only do one thing at a time: you can’t rest your wrist on it while using it as a memo holder, for one thing. It’s enough to stress a guy out… which may lead to (a) losing a very important memo, (b) suffering Carpal Tunnel Syndrome, and (c) losing your job due to the combination of (a) plus (b). At least you’ve got your unfortunately named Earth Hand Rest Cum Memo Holder to squeeze, which is nice.

Hand Made Felt Earth Stress Ball

(images via: Handmade Felt Toys)

Kudos to Amanda of Handmade Felt Toys for crafting this unique, hand-felted Earth Stress Ball. According to Amanda, while in the process of creating the ball “I got lost in the deep blue of the ocean and my mind started to drift.” Stress Relief Balls are just like that, which is why they’re called… never mind. In any case, it’s an exquisite fuzzy world in miniature that relieves stress on sight. Just don’t let the cat get at it.

Generic Blue & Green Earth Stress Ball

(image via: Earthscribble)

If you’re talkin’ back to basics, blue & green only, no logo stress reliever balls, they’re out there by the bushel-full… literally, in some cases. Detail is often an afterthought, however – don’t expect fiddly, frilly Norwegian fjords worthy of Slartibartfast – but any Earth Stress Reliever Ball worth its salt at least ought to feature Madagascar. If not, we humbly suggest the manufacturer SHUT. DOWN. EVERYTHING.