KISS & Mark Up: 10 Bizarre KISS Branded Products

In November of 2011, the world’s two greatest marketing minds (Gene Simmons and Sanrio) joined forces in a merchandising partnership certain to bring us something very, very special… yeah, just kidding, it was toilet paper. Then again, for a substantial portion of the human population (even more so in Venezuela) toilet paper IS very special, but we digress.

None other than former World Heavyweight Boxing champion Mike Tyson was on hand to demonstrate (we assume) the strength of KISS-themed Hello Kitty toilet paper during a July 2012 meet-up. And of course, the only real way to dispense this distinctive yet disposable personal hygiene product is via the official Gene Simmons Demon toilet paper holder, shown on display at KISS Expo Japan 2016. Constipation, here we come!

KISS Tire Valve Cover

Further putting the “roll” into rock ‘n roll is this KISS Gene Simmons Demon bike tire valve cap! Snapped by Flickr member Seed. in October of 2012, the cap really isn’t all that practical – imagine what it would look like after a few rainy/muddy rides – but hey, that’s the price of instant and lasting schoolyard coolness.

KISS Bird House

“Make a little birdhouse in your soul…” Oops, wrong band. On the face of it, this awesome KISS-themed birdhouse appears to be for the bats and not for the birds but who are we to judge?

Etsy seller buyabirdhouse is offering the Band KISS Birdhouse for just $50 but be advised – at press time there was only one left in stock with no indication any more would be produced. The handmade, vinyl-wrapped wooden birdhouses are said to be “great for indoor or outdoor use” though we think installing a birdhouse INSIDE one’s home is, er, kinda cuckoo.